monastery of soul ...

cloistered in semi-darknessa monastery of soul greyness cold, alone
writhing in wait for days to once again
advance the light
as the deficit defeats the senses
stymies the voice,
inhibits the muse,
ensures dormancy

the need to restore compells inner action
to renew
invigorate the senses
there is no wish to wait for Springthough this rest is fiercely determinedwhile it seemingly inflicts with no remorse
quietlysecretlysomething seeps inmaking provisionsto enhance strengthto garner power
for times to come
...in love
...in hope...in uprooting an inert existence

a quickening
a  pulse
palpitations indicating
the wake up call to  LIVE LIFE
and yet
life has forced this breathing space
this adjournment in part, a design on the future?
stirring devotion from deep within
to make love, make life, make sense of all this -- all this that came before NOW

a respite
before the reckoning
a relinquishing of control
 a forcing of hands a leveling of spirit
waist deep

a cleansing

a purifying to gain
a readying for ...wisdom brought forthvia a Master Plan to cultivate
the ESSENCE of LIFE

© 2009
image source: 11_12_2008 iris_brosch

this you are...this you were...

you entered my life at a time
when things were just beginning to move...
stagnant times were had
then suddenly just before you arrived
my soul started to sway, dance, flutter

I knew of your arrival before
you stepped into my world
the veil pulled back
in recognition of youin recognition of me
life was sometimes sad, oppressive
yet I released myself
from that sadness
oppression
some of it
pulled back violently
a veil that could not withstand the test of time.

I'd spent so much time making headway
into a happier place
a happier timeyears
then you came
i smiled
i knew i was in for something tangible
beautiful
loving
mutual

your vibe,
aura,
soul
was felt,
noticedlong before I laid eyes on you.

i,  backed into a corner
for quite sometime
knew that was not the place for me*(nobody puts Baby in the corner! :)  
i have let my creative self-shineeven more
with your aid
because you've given
and given much to inspire,
  youbrought joy

all these things
that make up who we are
who i am
who you are

these are good things
these are great things
these are beautiful and we are so lucky
to have our friendship
our love
our bond
it is a bond
a bond
that is glued together
with light and love and peace
and a creative melding

such similarity between us
we knew of from the start
we loved that from the start
we love it still...

i love how we grow into
something more
more substantial
each day
each new way

i love you my friend! I do!

©2009*had to put that in  -for Patrick Swayze  (RIP)**written for a friend some time ago...
image source: Friends_Forever_by_vizionsphotography

A NEW WIP and lots of XMAS Photos...please go see!  G A R A H S T A H

WIP and Christmas my way...

I've been busy the last few days with this WIP and readying for Christmas .

 It's freezing cold here and the winds, well, they'll
blow you away if you let them. I usually love the wind but the wind chill, is
beyond chilly! ;(...but I do love a soft flowing snowfall, the 'magical' kind
like in the classic "It's a Wonderful Life"...I bask in the comfort and warmth
of my home, but I do wish I had a fireplace (one day).
One of the most favourite things we like to do and it has become quite a
tradition, is to watch "Little Women" the Winona Ryder/Christian Bale version.
I just love this movie. We usually watch it the night before Thanksgiving
but this year it turned into a karaoke fest!  I think I must have lived a past life during the early 19th century ;). I love the mere mention of 'Transcendentalism' that is in the movie (sorry ~ I digress)...This is a holiday
film that just puts me in the mood for Christmas. I'm sure it's not a movie for everyone, especially the guys, but you never know.  This was also my favourite novel when I was a kid.
~
There is a story behind each & every ornament on our tree, but that would take too long to tell. But they were either made by my kids, chosen or gifted with great care and love. Sadly, I have so many, some remain in a box as there is just not enough room on this tree. So here are a few pics.  In my old place, 12 foot trees were the norm, but now
my ceilings are lower so 7 1/2 it is...

enjoy~

I haven't even unpacked my Old World Santa collection yet, but it is something I have been collecting for years and treasure! Maybe, I can dig up and old photo or two.

WIP  ~ 16 x 20
mixed media on canvas ~  untitled as yet

I hope all of your holiday preparations are going nicely. I hope this season is eventful in only the best of ways  and exhibit the true season of giving and sharing. This is what means the most to me...Noel

she tried...

she came to this placeafter lookin'  for some peace
ridin those southwestern winds
like the  bohemian soulthat she was at her core...
she was lookin' for her next adventure,sure beat puttin' her head in the sandthe sand, leveled by the love she thought she knewbut she didn't know a damn thingcept' that he was cruel

she could put her head in the sand become the hermitbut she had a destiny
a vivid dance with
her new fate
that called from a far off place
so she roamed the mountains
climbed them
one by one
lookin' over her shoulder
from time to time ~guess that's to be expected

what was it she ran away from?
what kind of past was hers?
was she loved?
had she left a piece of herself
behind in
some old dusty town?the one
where he lived
where he turned to stone

she tried

she gave her all

but times were tough

and livin' meant more.

she had no choice
for she was one who lived
who danced beneath the light of the moon
by night and  under the benevolent sun
by day
she didn't need him anymoreshe never did,
and besides, he left long before she did
and God knowsshe tried
she gave her all
but times were tough
and livin' meant more.
her soul was tellin' her
she needed to thrive
to make love along the way
to never cry so hard that she
had to assume the fetal position and just hide away
no, that wasn't her way
temptin' it was, during those rough spells
but she had too much to do
too much to see
and so much to Believe
it was out there for the takin'

but she knew the secret was not to
take but to give her little heart out
and that ~ all her dreams would make!

© 2009
image source: rebekka_guamp240leifsdamp243ttirloosely lyrics...
*long last look, she's still carryin' that damn baggage ~ maybe, it's time to kick that to the curb!

tears of abstraction...

tears of abstraction

16 x 20 mixed media on canvas

a closer view

sometimes tears are shed for those things that in our sadness, anger,
or disappointment, do not deem worthy,
 yet we shed them anyway, because our souls know the depth of what is, even if our minds donot.

...every situation we find ourselves in, there is always something worthy...

a moment,
a word,
a look,
a kiss,
a touch,
an embrace
...something worth those tears...yes?!

©

2009
*this may just be  a WIP (work-in-progress)
but for now she remains, as is...

remnants to ripples...

his warm breath and hands
wrapped her, held her
then escaped without warning
into the cool, 

vacant night
she sat leaning to touch the
warmth eminating from the woodstove that was
situated to her left and
to the remnants of him
to her right.

her gaze lingered,  for it was there that he sat
holding out his loving hands
to take hers
to embrace her
to pull her face to his
that was the moment when she  had let her heart go and finally believed...
but now she is left with remnants...
~but then, but then she felt a stirringa feeling of exaltationshe knew that her true heart was about to be found, by himher true north
all others were leading her to this Onethis Oneshe knew the others',  to a degree, were soul matesbut her best soul mate was coming
would soon be here and he would hold herin an embrace to shame all other embraceshis love would exhibithis profound interest in her, in  what she wanted and needed and who she wasat her core.and in return he would feel so lovedhe would BE so lovedbecause she would have profound interest in himhe would know he was her true northher true love

and together their love would create ripples, not mere remnantsand their Love would transcend and transform and be shared as the gift that they both recognized
as the truest gift...of the truest love...

©
2009
image source:  

Who will love me now by ~UnaObsesion

woman in love3 by ~Fort-o

*the phrase, of which, I borrowed a portion, 'love is profound interest', was coined
by Swami Anandakapila Saraswati's teacher to describe romantic LOVE.
I thought this to be in itself ~ profound!


an interesting article can be found here:
 http://www.support4change.com/relationships/love/intimacy/interest-tantric.html

remember when... a new painting!

remember when

16 x 20 acrylic on canvas

Again And Again, However We Know The Landscape Of Love

Again and again, however we know the landscape of love
and the little churchyard there, with its sorrowing names,
and the frighteningly silent abyss into which the others
fall: again and again the two of us walk out together
under the ancient trees, lie down again and again
among the flowers, face to face with the sky.

~Rainer Maria Rilke

i carry your heart with me

i carry your heart with me (i carry it in
my heart) i am never without it (anywhere
i go you go, my dear; and whatever is done
by only me is your doing, my darling)
i fear
no fate (for you are my fate, my sweet) i want
no world (for beautiful you are my world, my true)
and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you

here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life; which grows
higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

i carry your heart (i carry it in my heart)

ee cummings

* I shared two poems today as I felt them both

intensely beautiful and fitting...