Happy Holidays everyone...and see you soon!

I want to wish you all a joyous, love-filled, healthy holiday season and New Year. You have all been a huge part of my world, this past year. I had re-surfaced with this blog and it has been a great outlet for creativity and
self-expression. Your feedback has always been supportive and loving. I love this community and how we back each other up and share, and I have met so many kindred-spirits. That is what blogging is all about. It is a wonderfully supportive place to be. Thank you all!  ~ I wrote this and more originally knowing that I was planning on taking a break between Xmas and New Year's. I want to spend time with my kids while they are on winter break and want to recharge, renew and otherwise work on special projects, gearing up for the new year...then ...life happensI had prepared this post early this morning and it took me all day to get it posted, as my children have caught a stomach virus and have been ill for hours now. I am praying I am able to escape it as Moms can't get sick when needing to take care of their kids.  f i n g e r s    c r o s s e d ...

I had hoped to make my rounds to all of your blogs and return emails but it seems I may not be able to before the holiday. Please know I send you the very best of wishes for a perfect holiday! 

Merry Christmas! ~ Happy New Year!
much love & peace

~ 

See you soon!

image source: see you soon by rick blackwell

Merry Christmas & Happy New Year all...see you soon!

I want to wish you all a joyous, love-filled, healthy holiday season and New Year. You have all been a huge part of my world, this past year. I had re-surfaced with this blog and it has been a great outlet for creativity and
self-expression. Your feedback has always been supportive and loving. I love this community and how we back each other up and share, and I have met so many kindred-spirits. That is what blogging is all about. It is a wonderfully supportive place to be. Thank you all!  ~ I wrote this and more originally knowing that I was planning on taking a break between Xmas and New Year's. I want to spend time with my kids while they are on winter break and want to recharge, renew and otherwise work on special projects, gearing up for the new year...then ...life happensI had prepared this post early this morning and it took me all day to get it posted, as my children have caught a stomach virus and have been ill for hours now. I am praying I am able to escape it as Moms can't get sick when needing to take care of their kids.  f i n g e r s   c r o s s e d ...

I had hoped to make my rounds to all of your blogs and return emails but it seems I may not be able to before the holiday. Please know I send you the very best of wishes for a perfect holiday! 

Merry Christmas! ~ Happy New Year!
much love & peace

~ 

See you soon!

image source: see you soon by rick blackwell

all I want for Christmas...

Truthfully, all I ever wished for Xmas aside from love, health, comfort and world peace for all,  is
A R T  S U P P L I E S ...yes, true I can buy these anytime for myself and I do, but
truth be told, I have always made it easy for loved ones to know this is the easiest and best
choice of gift for me. Do they take this advise? ha, almost never. Also funny, I have thought about past relationships and the man always stresses over what to get
his woman (this woman)  for the holidays...skip the diamonds, I want art supplies! I'm  not kidding!

diamonds are wonderful, gorgeous, but not practical and a new easel,
paints, shelving, canvas, cubbies, paint brushes...are always practical for the Artist.

ART SUPPLIES rule and ARE diamonds to me!

all in truth and all in fun~and BOOKS also make that list...:)or build me a dream 'studio' and you'll never have to get me another gift, ever! :)

and not so practical but definitely necessary to my happiness is my Old World Santa Collection ~
photo Christmas 2008...this year they remain in their storage trunk. Ooo, and this isn't even all of them. And, I know Christmas should be all about giving but do tell ~ what is your favourite gift to receive? 

 

Happy Christmas...
Gelukkige Kerstmis
Glückliches Weihnachten
Noël heureux
Feliz Navidad
Natale felice
Natal feliz

image source: painting of artists studio by unknown artist
photo by Calli 2008

i dream a dream...

we all have a dream or dreams. one ofmine is to be able to ice skate
like a graceful, flowing, lovely, athletic ~ figure skater. i want for that ease of
movement. i want to feel the cool air on my face as i twirl in
enormous circle eights; designed by my skates and felt with my heart.
i have not skated since i was young and
want to so badly. I used to rollerblade and loved it but
injuries have made that a current thing of the past. i cross-country
ski'd and fell on my ass more times than i can count, but i had a damn good time trying.
and it should be of no surprise when i say that figure skating
is one of my favourite events in the Olympics. love to watch
the fluid movement of these ice dancers! much like ballet, so free flowing
and beautiful. just amazing! sometimes, so beautiful, it can reduce me to tears.

i suppose i think of this, when i hear,
Joni Mitchell's ~ 'River' ...a song i listen to often.

as noted by my sidebar ;)

Its meaning sad and melancholy, about losing a lover, but i love the song, music and lyrics. what's not to love,  it's soulful and sung by Joni Mitchell or even Sarah Mclachlan, just beautiful. a song that has always tugged at my
Christmastime heartstrings. and the image of ice skating
just takes me to another place and time when life was simpler, innocent or so i imagine.
eras past where skating was a loved and treasured pastime. a place for a promising date.
a time when families did something 'together'... it just stirs up so many emotions
and feelings. God, how i love this time of year. a time of endings and yet a time of
new beginnings.

Happy Christmas, all...with love

~ Gelukkige Kerstmis ~ Glückliches Weihnachten ~ 

 Noël heureux ~ Feliz Navidad ~ Natale felice ~ Natal feliz

image source: photo 1: tumblr++recklesslyming
photo 2: cestnouveautumblr
photo 3: not-long-now+-15-days

monastery of soul ...

cloistered in semi-darknessa monastery of soul greyness cold, alone
writhing in wait for days to once again
advance the light
as the deficit defeats the senses
stymies the voice,
inhibits the muse,
ensures dormancy

the need to restore compells inner action
to renew
invigorate the senses
there is no wish to wait for Springthough this rest is fiercely determinedwhile it seemingly inflicts with no remorse
quietlysecretlysomething seeps inmaking provisionsto enhance strengthto garner power
for times to come
...in love
...in hope...in uprooting an inert existence

a quickening
a  pulse
palpitations indicating
the wake up call to  LIVE LIFE
and yet
life has forced this breathing space
this adjournment in part, a design on the future?
stirring devotion from deep within
to make love, make life, make sense of all this -- all this that came before NOW

a respite
before the reckoning
a relinquishing of control
 a forcing of hands a leveling of spirit
waist deep

a cleansing

a purifying to gain
a readying for ...wisdom brought forthvia a Master Plan to cultivate
the ESSENCE of LIFE

© 2009
image source: 11_12_2008 iris_brosch

this you are...this you were...

you entered my life at a time
when things were just beginning to move...
stagnant times were had
then suddenly just before you arrived
my soul started to sway, dance, flutter

I knew of your arrival before
you stepped into my world
the veil pulled back
in recognition of youin recognition of me
life was sometimes sad, oppressive
yet I released myself
from that sadness
oppression
some of it
pulled back violently
a veil that could not withstand the test of time.

I'd spent so much time making headway
into a happier place
a happier timeyears
then you came
i smiled
i knew i was in for something tangible
beautiful
loving
mutual

your vibe,
aura,
soul
was felt,
noticedlong before I laid eyes on you.

i,  backed into a corner
for quite sometime
knew that was not the place for me*(nobody puts Baby in the corner! :)  
i have let my creative self-shineeven more
with your aid
because you've given
and given much to inspire,
  youbrought joy

all these things
that make up who we are
who i am
who you are

these are good things
these are great things
these are beautiful and we are so lucky
to have our friendship
our love
our bond
it is a bond
a bond
that is glued together
with light and love and peace
and a creative melding

such similarity between us
we knew of from the start
we loved that from the start
we love it still...

i love how we grow into
something more
more substantial
each day
each new way

i love you my friend! I do!

©2009*had to put that in  -for Patrick Swayze  (RIP)**written for a friend some time ago...
image source: Friends_Forever_by_vizionsphotography

A NEW WIP and lots of XMAS Photos...please go see!  G A R A H S T A H

WIP and Christmas my way...

I've been busy the last few days with this WIP and readying for Christmas .

 It's freezing cold here and the winds, well, they'll
blow you away if you let them. I usually love the wind but the wind chill, is
beyond chilly! ;(...but I do love a soft flowing snowfall, the 'magical' kind
like in the classic "It's a Wonderful Life"...I bask in the comfort and warmth
of my home, but I do wish I had a fireplace (one day).
One of the most favourite things we like to do and it has become quite a
tradition, is to watch "Little Women" the Winona Ryder/Christian Bale version.
I just love this movie. We usually watch it the night before Thanksgiving
but this year it turned into a karaoke fest!  I think I must have lived a past life during the early 19th century ;). I love the mere mention of 'Transcendentalism' that is in the movie (sorry ~ I digress)...This is a holiday
film that just puts me in the mood for Christmas. I'm sure it's not a movie for everyone, especially the guys, but you never know.  This was also my favourite novel when I was a kid.
~
There is a story behind each & every ornament on our tree, but that would take too long to tell. But they were either made by my kids, chosen or gifted with great care and love. Sadly, I have so many, some remain in a box as there is just not enough room on this tree. So here are a few pics.  In my old place, 12 foot trees were the norm, but now
my ceilings are lower so 7 1/2 it is...

enjoy~

I haven't even unpacked my Old World Santa collection yet, but it is something I have been collecting for years and treasure! Maybe, I can dig up and old photo or two.

WIP  ~ 16 x 20
mixed media on canvas ~  untitled as yet

I hope all of your holiday preparations are going nicely. I hope this season is eventful in only the best of ways  and exhibit the true season of giving and sharing. This is what means the most to me...Noel

she tried...

she came to this placeafter lookin'  for some peace
ridin those southwestern winds
like the  bohemian soulthat she was at her core...
she was lookin' for her next adventure,sure beat puttin' her head in the sandthe sand, leveled by the love she thought she knewbut she didn't know a damn thingcept' that he was cruel

she could put her head in the sand become the hermitbut she had a destiny
a vivid dance with
her new fate
that called from a far off place
so she roamed the mountains
climbed them
one by one
lookin' over her shoulder
from time to time ~guess that's to be expected

what was it she ran away from?
what kind of past was hers?
was she loved?
had she left a piece of herself
behind in
some old dusty town?the one
where he lived
where he turned to stone

she tried

she gave her all

but times were tough

and livin' meant more.

she had no choice
for she was one who lived
who danced beneath the light of the moon
by night and  under the benevolent sun
by day
she didn't need him anymoreshe never did,
and besides, he left long before she did
and God knowsshe tried
she gave her all
but times were tough
and livin' meant more.
her soul was tellin' her
she needed to thrive
to make love along the way
to never cry so hard that she
had to assume the fetal position and just hide away
no, that wasn't her way
temptin' it was, during those rough spells
but she had too much to do
too much to see
and so much to Believe
it was out there for the takin'

but she knew the secret was not to
take but to give her little heart out
and that ~ all her dreams would make!

© 2009
image source: rebekka_guamp240leifsdamp243ttirloosely lyrics...
*long last look, she's still carryin' that damn baggage ~ maybe, it's time to kick that to the curb!

tears of abstraction...

tears of abstraction

16 x 20 mixed media on canvas

a closer view

sometimes tears are shed for those things that in our sadness, anger,
or disappointment, do not deem worthy,
 yet we shed them anyway, because our souls know the depth of what is, even if our minds donot.

...every situation we find ourselves in, there is always something worthy...

a moment,
a word,
a look,
a kiss,
a touch,
an embrace
...something worth those tears...yes?!

©

2009
*this may just be  a WIP (work-in-progress)
but for now she remains, as is...

remnants to ripples...

his warm breath and hands
wrapped her, held her
then escaped without warning
into the cool, 

vacant night
she sat leaning to touch the
warmth eminating from the woodstove that was
situated to her left and
to the remnants of him
to her right.

her gaze lingered,  for it was there that he sat
holding out his loving hands
to take hers
to embrace her
to pull her face to his
that was the moment when she  had let her heart go and finally believed...
but now she is left with remnants...
~but then, but then she felt a stirringa feeling of exaltationshe knew that her true heart was about to be found, by himher true north
all others were leading her to this Onethis Oneshe knew the others',  to a degree, were soul matesbut her best soul mate was coming
would soon be here and he would hold herin an embrace to shame all other embraceshis love would exhibithis profound interest in her, in  what she wanted and needed and who she wasat her core.and in return he would feel so lovedhe would BE so lovedbecause she would have profound interest in himhe would know he was her true northher true love

and together their love would create ripples, not mere remnantsand their Love would transcend and transform and be shared as the gift that they both recognized
as the truest gift...of the truest love...

©
2009
image source:  

Who will love me now by ~UnaObsesion

woman in love3 by ~Fort-o

*the phrase, of which, I borrowed a portion, 'love is profound interest', was coined
by Swami Anandakapila Saraswati's teacher to describe romantic LOVE.
I thought this to be in itself ~ profound!


an interesting article can be found here:
 http://www.support4change.com/relationships/love/intimacy/interest-tantric.html

remember when... a new painting!

remember when

16 x 20 acrylic on canvas

Again And Again, However We Know The Landscape Of Love

Again and again, however we know the landscape of love
and the little churchyard there, with its sorrowing names,
and the frighteningly silent abyss into which the others
fall: again and again the two of us walk out together
under the ancient trees, lie down again and again
among the flowers, face to face with the sky.

~Rainer Maria Rilke

i carry your heart with me

i carry your heart with me (i carry it in
my heart) i am never without it (anywhere
i go you go, my dear; and whatever is done
by only me is your doing, my darling)
i fear
no fate (for you are my fate, my sweet) i want
no world (for beautiful you are my world, my true)
and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you

here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life; which grows
higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

i carry your heart (i carry it in my heart)

ee cummings

* I shared two poems today as I felt them both

intensely beautiful and fitting...

southbound train to nowhere...

as she walks the tracks of her life she wonders what part he will playor is wanting him like riding a southbound train to nowhere?

 he speaks
cojoles, teases,
implies
as if he knows all that has been and will ever be

 she just wants to be free, 
yet she's tackled
like a quarterback on Sunday
wantin' to move down that field
and
trippin' on steps made
for those over three

 his freedom is
not the same as herssome say, "shackled by beliefs that have no place
 in the realm of love"
 all is not said and done!she's acutely aware
of rights and wrongs
 and invisible constraints
that pull like the white of the straight jacket
that strangles the life from
the virtuous woman
she needs to be
and she, she just wants to be free

yet she's tackled
like a quarterback on Sunday
wantin' to move down that field
and
trippin' on steps made
for those over three
~where will she be, come Winter?
when earth sleeps
and the north winds blow
as the ravens make their turn about town
with their tail feathers all aglow
what do the ravens know?...she may never know
as she rides that southbound train to nowhere...

©  2009loosely lyrics...definitely, a work-in-progress!

image source: Train_Tracks_2_by_batsforlashes

and so 'not' related to my poem.
take a listen to an awesome new song with Daughtry and Vince Gill ~ here, by pressing the orange button, once you are on the site:
http://www.elyrics.net/read/d/daughtry-lyrics/tennessee-line-lyrics-18.html

*I met Vince a few years ago, what a sweet man!...Even tho' I rarely listen to country music these days, I will always have a soft spot for Vince.
and kudos to Richard Marx for bringing these two together!
He's not only a brilliant songwriter but just plain, brilliant!

sacred dreams~ sacred love...

you entered my dreams,
sacred dreams
immersed in sensuality
in a sweet softness of
heart-soul love

my dreams
became something
something more,
more beautiful
more sacred
each time I dreamt of you

each time the Gods
allowed me to hold you in
my thoughts and in my arms

each time you spoke
without words
you let me know just how much
you loved me
how you treasured US

for years now
you have visited my dreams
held me closer than even real-life imaginings
knew me better than any real-life soul ever could

your appearance changed
each time but maintained a certain consistency
dark hair, dark eyes
yet feeling the same each time
always strong
always brilliant
always gentle and kind
always knowing that you could never harm
my heart, my body or my soul
you regard my spirit as your spirit
we are One
we are Love
we are forever joined
symbolically
figuratively
literally
spiritually in the heavens born
forever, no matter the lack of
your physical presence in the now
because your soul presence
is always there, always near
as I feel you in my daytime thoughts
and in my daytime dreams
I feel you moving closer

...and I love you


and someday, my twin-soul Love
you will enter my wakened life

and we will be forever set free...

©
2009
image source: protection_by_Vic4U (one of my all-time faves)...

vertigo...

it comes on strong
out of nowhere
...as can love

it goes
out of nowhere
...as can love

flooded with sensations
dizzying moments
equilibrium  ~ out of control
swaying
uncertaintyhead in the clouds
moving
more swaying

to the left
to the right
upside
downside
backward
forward

fluttering herefluttering there
...as
love
moves

to what degree?
what are the
symptoms of love?

Love:
sweaty palms
racing heart
tummy butterflies
lightheadedness
daydreaming
made useless
loss of appetite
no need for sleepanticipation
inability to concentrate

it's almost as if
 Love = Vertigo

but one can take a prescription for Vertigo
what can one take for Love?

...but more Love!


©
2009

image source: Vertigo pic of and by Calli* correction: pic not by Callipic by Alexandra 

she knows...a NEW painting!

16 x 20 acrylic on canvas

finally! a new painting! 

this one, i think...she's pretty self-assured. she's
definitely a woman that knows what she wants, sort of like me...
i like her!

please make a suggestion for a title for her. so far
it's 'she knows'...but that was off the cuff and I didn't give
it much thought, so,
let me know what you think.

and...thanks for viewing!

©
2009

ps~have you noticed the huge difference in the new post editor for the image sizes of large or xtra large. personally, that has been driving me crazy. they need an in-between size...:)

temper this heart...

she stands
paralyzed
unsure
yet
wanting

she is caught
in the glitz of him

her dreams wandered
took hold, then dissipatedno chance,no chance of fruition

knowing full well
she should run
make haste
temper this desire
this need
to be near, him

for he has not proven himself to her
he has not shown that she can let go
she feels frozen in time
in that time of loving himshe remembers, all too well...
chainedin this space
this wanton space

she wants to let go
she wants to understand
this limbo, this grey space
with so many broken places
she wants
to be free to love
yet letting go does not
seem an option

she is forever having to
temper her heart...
when all she wants to do....

is to love...

©
2009written September 2009

image source:sleepwalker+by+jessica+tremp

please visit my newest painting at: G A R A H S T A H