Tuesday, April 28, 2009

shades of grey...

you are in those places
those indiscernible
impenetrable places

however did you get in?

those crevices in my mind
within those shades of grey
betwixt & between

at times obviously so
at times when I am subtly low

the wind, it seems, has carried
you with keen direction
towards me

during these forced quiet moments
you conceal yourself
scrambling for distance
causing deepened wants
along with
a developing abyss

humor displayed, if only
to camouflage hurts
and a weary heart

deceptions unfurled
as if a sail on a laser sailboat

impalpable you!

me with weakened senses…
which were once dynamic?

then a soft whisper arrives
from a distance…

“rain and quiet and rest…all essential

all designed to soothe the pain.”

© Calli ~ 2009
In part, a beautiful collaboration … thank you,
for the whisper!

image source: 2c_amanda_169L

Monday, April 27, 2009

The new version ...

self-portrait ~ 18 x 24 acrylic on canvas

self-portrait ~ close up

So here she is made new and no longer feeling broken...and the background became green for the very reason that to her, green is the color of happiness.

old version: Broken Open ~ 2007

on the new version: I apologize for the slightest bit of the suns rays spread across the painting. Photographing artwork is not an easy thing. Lighting is very important.

thank you for visiting!

an old painting made new...

Once again, I have taken an old painting and decided, just a couple hours ago that 'she', formerly titled 'Broken Open' needed to be revived, redone. So I gave her a makeover, and titled her 'Self-Portrait'... She is a red-head and even though I am not, I decided she should remain as one. Besides, I like to paint different hair colors on my paintings. She is roughly me, but this holds true for many of my figurative works because 'symbolically' they are me, or an aspect of me. This is true for many artists. ~ If you have an issue with nudity, please do not click the link to my art blog

if you are okay with nude art, by all means click the link. This is only my second attempt at painting a nude figure. I actually look forward to doing many more in the near future.

The before is 'Broken Open', a rather sad version and not very good, but I am rather pleased with how she turned out after her makeover.
You can also click any painting on the art blog and it will enlarge the painting for you to view closer up.

and please feel free to 'follow' me there as well...

thanks gems!

Sunday, April 26, 2009

if you forget me...

If You Forget Me ~ by Pablo Neruda

I want you to know
one thing.

You know how this is:
if I look
at the crystal moon, at the red branch
of the slow autumn at my window,
if I touch
near the fire
the impalpable ash
or the wrinkled body of the log,
everything carries me to you,
as if everything that exists,
aromas, light, metals,
were little boats
that sail
toward those isles of yours that wait for me.

Well, now,
if little by little you stop loving me
I shall stop loving you little by little.

If suddenly
you forget me
do not look for me,
for I shall already have forgotten you.

If you think it long and mad,
the wind of banners
that passes through my life,
and you decide
to leave me at the shore
of the heart where I have roots,
that on that day,
at that hour,
I shall lift my arms
and my roots will set off
to seek another land.

if each day,
each hour,
you feel that you are destined for me
with implacable sweetness,
if each day a flower
climbs up to your lips to seek me,
ah my love, ah my own,
in me all that fire is repeated,
in me nothing is extinguished or forgotten,
my love feeds on your love, beloved,
and as long as you live it will be in your arms
without leaving mine

image source: MLn17P9oa2859tsdymPOiFuh_500

Saturday, April 25, 2009

amelie brings smiles...

and peace...and the sweetest of dreams realized such as love...

if you have not yet seen this wonderful film Amelie, then what are you waiting for?
it's one of life's gems. a feel good film that will soften even the hardest
of hearts...audrey tatou will make you smile in spite of yourself. love.love.love this film...

from Wikipedia: Amélie, literally The Fabulous Destiny of Amélie Poulain) is a 2001 French film directed by Jean-Pierre Jeunet and starring Audrey Tautou. Written by Jeunet with Guillaume Laurant, the film is a whimsical and somewhat idealised depiction of contemporary Parisian life, set in Montmartre. It tells the story of a shy waitress who decides to change the lives of those around her for the better, while struggling with her own isolation.

peace & love and all good things!

alluring captions...

two joined together like cursive writing!

love. (period)

Thursday, April 23, 2009

you are love...

You are Love!

In my dreams you were

all things tender

Now, look at you!

Look at you here now, as you caress my face

with a gentleness I’ve never known nor witnessed

You touch me as if I am a delicate piece of bone china and I will break

and shatter underneath your fingertips.

You examine my lips

as if they are

the most exquisite

Piece of art known to man

You are Love!

I am melting in this desire for you

this cherished moment

that I have ached for, for what feels like a 1,000 years

and dreamt a 1,000 times

Your love has surpassed the love

in all fairy tales and myths combined!

The intensity

of this love with you is beyond me

beyond comprehension

beyond anything!

This is what it is to be


There is a purity in your touch

that matches so completely the touch

Of God and the Angels

You embody everything ever contained

within the soul of every lover who has ever existed in the history

of Man

You are Love!

and you leave me breathless...

© Calli 2009

image source: sort of unknown- I title it 'Tenderness' - I can't locate its origins but I will say this, it is one of the most tender of all photographs of lovers, that I have ever encountered.

victor hugo...hold fast to your dreams...

Wednesday, April 22, 2009


Contemplation: In basic terms it is a form of prayer or meditation.

For me, contemplation is something that I've indulged in since I was very young, though I wasn't even aware of what it was I was involved in. I have always been in my head, and have been one to think deeply on various issues, ideas, and theories. This is what I refer to as the 'philosophical soul' aspect of myself. There is also the 'mystical aspect' of myself that arrived almost unbeknownst. I have learned that there are times and things that should just be allowed to happen or not happen. We should never force and fight against change and inevitable new experiences. We have all heard the expression 'go with the flow' and this is what we should be doing. I have learned that Spirit or God or God/Goddess
works in such mysterious ways that we simply need to go within, request,
release extraneous thoughts, rest and then eventually we receive.

This most treasured and beautiful quote by Rumi, the mystic poet comes to mind:

When I die
I will soar with angels
And when I die to the angels,
What I shall become
You cannot imagine.

© Calli 2009
image source: dl.ziza.ru

earth day...

regardless of rainy skies - love the earth - love your SELF, love others...and share the colors of the rainbow - pay homage to the sunrise, the sunset, LIFE! Life is beautiful, so is the earth if we learn to care for it as we should.

earth day today!...my post on earth day can be found via my older blog

visit me here:


earth day...

close-up view...she (mother earth) is looking quite sad!

our world ~ our responsibility

In celebration of earth day 2009!

The earth is ours to treasure to behold its beauty,
mother nature's beauty - we must as individuals do what we can
to help our earth survive. The little things can be a good place to start.
recycle, reuse, repurpose! It's all good!
Use compact fluorescent bulbs that preserve power and last more than 50-60 times longer than regular incandescent bulbs, roughly 6 years. They are more expensive, but worth it! They save a great deal of money on your energy bill. But be very careful when disposing of these as they do contain Mercury. Also on the positive side they save 2,000 times their own weight in greenhouse gases. (this is beyond my comprehension);)
Purchase reusable bags from your grocery store and use them
religiously so as not to use those nasty plastic bags that fill up our
land fills and do not disintegrate properly. I bought mine
from Wegmans and I use them for everything. I take them into other
stores (ha) and use them at the library, book store, at a local fruit stand. Their uses are endless.
Plant a tree! Plant a flower!
do all that you can!
walk vs. drive when you are able!
ride a bike!
ride a motorbike!
take the bus! - car pool!

I know there is a great deal of controversy
regarding global warming, etc but I for one
think it's quite obvious the major changes that
have occurred in the last several years with regard to our climate!
Join a group, make your voice heard
utilize this through the internet!

Save the Polar Bears!
Save the Wolves!
Hug a tree!
Kiss the ground!

© Calli 2009

* This concludes your pep talk for today!!! :)

image: our world ~ our responsibility by Calli

Tuesday, April 21, 2009


You know, if I had my own horse, I think I'd have to name him or her tuesday! I love this name and always loved the name on the actress tuesday weld!:) I also love horses and the dream (one of them) is to have a huge piece of land with lots of horses. I would have to have several as one would not be enough. I visit a horse that lives adjacent to my place and he is a sweetie but he's too small to ride. We all have our dreams, the life kind, the idea kind, the plans, the financial goal-setting kind but for me, the main one would be to create this sanctuary with more land, my (church) studio and horses. Maybe even raise some alpacas. I looked into this a few years ago and they are very cool and very lovable! So tuesday must be the 'dreaming' day! maybe that's why I like it so much!

hope your tuesday is sweet!
~ Calli

image source: obsession art

Monday, April 20, 2009

the gift...

The gift

Woman is a gift to Man

As Man is a gift to Woman

The right man, a loving man

Not a bully or a passive aggressive

Nor a possessive or obsessive

Same for a woman, she cannot be these things and have a Man.

The true gift of one another comes from

The purest state of:

Man to Woman

Women to Man

A balanced Man

A balanced Woman

A respect for the masculine and the feminine

a balance of both possessed within

Yin and Yang!

His strength ~ Her gentleness

All the same…

To be treasured ~ To be loved ~ To be adored

To become Whole separately then,

and only then...

Become Two souls Joined as One!

That’s the gift!

© Calli 2009

image source: love gift by firenzesca


dreams beginning
forming as the waves crash to the shore!

dreams unfettered, solid and pure!

dreams colorful and enchanting ...

dreams of you and me

holding hands and crossing that bridge
the one with all the fallen leaves …

dreams of walking your city streets
and my country roads …

dreams, baby of making love
on the beach

with the wet, hot sand touching our bodies!

dreams of pressing our lips together
as the passion reigns us in

fingers pressing against flesh


of kissing you ~ you kissing me


© Calli 2009

*and you wonder why she never wants to wake up!

image source: dream by han wu shen

monday, monday - painting blue skies ...

Painting blue skies today! regardless of the overcast 'real' skies that carry with them this looming feeling. Mondays can be quite dull and also a bit melancholy...I prefer Tuesdays! :) and sometimes...

“There is melancholy in the wind and sorrow in the grass” ~ Charles Kuralt

image source: time for a change by LoLo Malaya

Sunday, April 19, 2009


I love your body, baby!

But it’s your soul that I want to touch!

I love kissing your sweet lips

But it’s your smile that makes my heart swoon!

I love your strong arms

But it’s the strength they provide that moves me!

I love your face

It lights up my world!

I love your legs

But it’s walking with you through life

That means the most to me!

I love your eyes

But it’s what they see and how they see it - that does it for me!

I love your hands

And, I want to hold them forever!

I love your mouth

But it’s the breath of life

That passes through that endears me most to you!

I love your broad shoulders

But it’s the way they carry the weight of your world

That impresses me most!

And I love…

I love…

I love Everything about you!

© Calli 2009

image title: love

note: I write of love because love is the single most important thing in life, and as one of my favorite quotes states: "Love is not an emotion, it is our very nature ~ Ravi Shankar



ps~ the water in this image is supposed to be rippling, though the animated gif is not functioning here at blogger.

love has invaded my being...

I didn’t even know your name
Yet somehow, it whispered upon my soul

A reason for our hearts to touch
Before all else…

Here you are and a reason must exist
It must!

You are here inside me!
Having dwelled there for sometime now

It’s as if my heart could not make this up!

It tells of lovely stories of Happily Ever After!

It makes me shudder at glimpses of pure ecstasy!
Soul knowledge, what other explanation?
For this love!
For this beauty!

Is my sanity to be questioned, or am I truly touching
Within this magic realm?
This place

Where fairy tales are made…

© Calli 2009

image source: love film by i am a mermaid princess

you make me smile...

“Somewhere there is someone that dreams of your smile, and finds in your presence that life is worthwhile, so when you are lonely remember it’s true, someone somewhere is thinking of you.”

Author unknown

image by: michael mccabe images

Saturday, April 18, 2009

bohemian bliss...

bohemian bliss

this is where WE
shake off our day-to-day existence
run barefoot and free…

this is where WE
touch and hold…

this is where we are safe
nothing can take this away!

our paradise!
we are in our eternal element

no rules
no religion
this is ‘our’ religion!

this is where out truest selves
can shine …

our impassioned hearts
can ride those waves
uninhibited and fancy-free!

oh, how blissful!
come away with me!

a place, a state-of-mind?
it matters not!

just meet me here in this
bohemian bliss!

© Calli 2009

image source: vsmith photobucket


Out of this entire World
Containing billions upon billions of souls
Yours came to embrace mine
Even kissed it!

A Cosmic force!
Breathed out from the Heavens!
destined? fated?

We may never know
The reasons why?

Though, we do know
That love was found!
If only for a short while.

Dissipating, emphatically, NO!
Temporarily flowing
Into another realm
Waiting, for just the right moment!

A teaser from the Universe,
Seems hardly fair!

Though, I’ve a profound knowing
That if I let my heart flame rest
Perhaps walls will come crashing down
Or the curtain fall
And a different scene take the stage!

And solace can be found…
No further complications…
No disasters waiting in the wings…

Just Perfect timing!
Perfect bliss!
Perfect touching of our stars!

This life = This now!

This could be…
If only we were free!

© Calli 2009

image source: throwing, waiting, wishing by Ronaaa

Friday, April 17, 2009


Like silkened waters
Rippling across small pebbles
Not without sharp edges...

You’ve arrived!

And I am unleashed and unfettered!

I have longed for the Sun
Though not as I have longed
For YOU!

What next…

© Calli 2009

Image source: Rapunzel by Araantonak on deviantart

Note: yes, apparently I’ve made up a word!

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Old blog revitalized...

I've decided that Garahstah - Picture Maker (Native American in Iroquois) my old blog, should remain as the blog where I post new paintings or works-in-progress or other artistic musings, so as not to clutter up my Shades of Grey. (wow! not only a run-on sentence but by God, she's long-winded) ...lol

Please visit for new paintings or revitalized ones!

Comments are always welcome gems and please do visit often!


~ Calli

New paintings...

Lady in Red

I've decided that Garahstah - Picture Maker (Native American in Iroquois) should remain as the blog where I post new paintings or works-in-progress or other artistic musings, so as not to clutter up my Shades of Grey.

The following are a few paintings that I've not posted as yet to my art site, must get to work on that! These are experimental pieces. One 'Lady in Red' (see above) she's been re-done almost completely. If you visit my site you will see she had alabaster skin and now she is more textured, (she writes not knowing what word she is looking for)? I have also been experimenting on masonite board, which proves to be a nice little alternative to canvas, especially when I'm out of it, first time ever.

Comments are welcome gems and please do visit often!

~ Calli

Artist ~ for lack of a better title

Artist ~ up close & personal (close-up view)


Down on my Knees

Autumn Storm
experimental ~ acrylic on masonite board - landscape

Tuesday, April 14, 2009



Is that you?
Having arrived from some not-so-distant place

With a remembrance of past
Where and when you
Showered love upon me!
And, it was reciprocated with absolute joviality!

It strikes deeply!
Such a deep, deep, and compelling resonance
Whatever ‘this’ is…
Wherever ‘that’ was…

Had its beginning in an Echo!

A quiet thing that has stood the test of time
Though time, time is but an illusion,
Yet this echo carried in the collective consciousness
This particular part belonging
Only to you and to me!

This is OUR ECHO…

That will reverberate for ALL ETERNITY!

© Calli 2009

image source: Couple in love by Martin Richiardone

Library Kiss...

Library Kiss…

Oh, this reading, researching, resonating with that which is!
Mind all aflutter with numbers, theories, philosophizing!

I am as disheveled as these shelves
Each part of myself scrambling
To match your beat! …mmm, take off
Your glasses, Oh, what a treat!

This is tantalizing, Baby!

This readying myself, rectifying my needs -
Now relishing YOUR readiness!

Mmm, I must throw down these old books,
Ideas and beliefs!

Pull you to me!
Devour your lips with sumptuous greed!

Getting back to the basics!

With this our Library Kiss!

© Calli 2009

image title: Library kiss

Sunday, April 12, 2009

You make me happy...

You make me happy
You magnify my better half
You make me certain
Though all I have today is your photograph
You make me happy


all in fun people! ~ image source: photos.jpgmag.com

Sunday, April 5, 2009

When We Kiss...


Look at You!
Look at you standing there
So suave, so handsome
With that dimple on your chin
And that passion in your eyes!

Oh, you charmer you!
Can I kiss that dimple of yours when my lips rest upon your chin?
Would that be all right with you?

On the other hand, tattoo it directly on my lips
When we partake in that LONGED FOR KISS!

The ONE we will share
Before we breathe a single word…


I can see us now – the force –
Those little longing voices
Rising from the deep
Releasing as our lips finally MEET!

Speaking of those lips baby, yours I can tell
Were made just for me! – I put in a special order for those
And I recognize my ‘creation’ – I do!

And I am shaking inside at the anticipation and amazement of what’s to come


© ~ Calli 2009

image: i-will-miss-you-kiss

Friday, April 3, 2009

Do What You Have To Do...

Do What You Have To Do

Sarah McLachlan

What ravages of spirit

conjured this temptuous rage

created you a monster

broken by the rules of love

and fate has lead you through it

you do what you have to do

and fate has led you through it

you do what you have to do ...

but I have the sense to recognize that

I don't know how to let you go

every moment marked

with apparitions of your soul

I'm ever swiftly moving

trying to escape this desire

the yearning to be near you

I do what I have to do

the yearning to be near you

I do what I have to do

but I have the sense to recognize

that I don't know how

to let you go

I don't know how

to let you go

a glowing ember

burning hot

burning slow

deep within I'm shaken by the violence

of existing for only you

I know I can't be with you

I do what I have to do

I know I can't be with you

I do what I have to do

but I have the sense to recognize

I don't know how to let you go

I don't know how to let you go

I don't know how to let you go

photo by Natalja Afonina

Thursday, April 2, 2009

spreading the love...

Shh, Just shut up and kiss me
you know what I like
no time for talk

It took you awhile baby,
but once you got it, you definitely got it!

when you kiss me like that
rainbows multiply!

it's tantalizing
to my senses
simple pleasures baby
that's ALL I need

a girl could go crazy waitin on you
come on now, don't tease me...just please me!

So Just Shut Up And Kiss Me!

© ~ Calli 2009

*this poem was conceived last night and suddenly I said to myself okay who did that song, I know, oh yes it's Mary Chapin-Carpenter - gosh haven't listened to country music in like 6 months or so but too perfect, had to put the song/video link below. This sweet image is of Faith Hill and Tim McGraw, just because it exudes the 'playfulness' that this poem was born of... ~ Calli


and here is a 'Classic' shut up and kiss me moment.
Cary Grant and Ingrid Bergman -

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

a poet to call my own...

A poet to call my own…

Wouldn’t that be something?

Would I, could I, ever tire of his words?

I think not! As his words, the lines of his poems

Would read like deep *sighs* that we’d both breathe after we’ve made love

A continuation of foreplay, after play, anything play

A melding, a meshing, our souls entwined in bliss!

His words would be like candy, ever so sweet

That I would ask him repeatedly to breathe new words and verse

To feed my heart, my soul!

A poet to call my own

Now, wouldn’t that be something?

© ~ Calli 2009

written Valentine's Day 2009 - all in fun! - what better time to think of love and all the possibilities of that!

image source: blog skin